Catholic Diocese of Spokane, Washington
Official News Magazine of the Diocese of Spokane
P.O. Box 1453, Spokane WA 99210
(509) 358-7340; FAX: (509) 358-7302
Letters to the Editor
(From the August 20, 2015 edition of the Inland Register)
The Inland Register welcomes letters to the editor. Letters should be no longer than 500 words. Letters must be signed, with address and phone number for contact, but names will be withheld upon request. Letters may be edited for length or clarity. Remember to be charitable.
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Fax: (509) 358-7302
Two of the most frequently asked questions by people who are going through a divorce are, “How long does it take to heal?” and “When will my life go back to normal?” Although time is so easily measured by hours, weeks and years, the time for healing is immeasurable. In all her wisdom, Rose Kennedy [1890-1995] once wrote, “It has been said, ‘time heals all wounds.’ I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.”
When my marriage of 46 years ended, I drew strength from a valuable lesson I learned after a devastating fall I suffered some years prior to the divorce. The period of recuperation from debilitating injuries involving my neck and shoulder seemed endless. It was impossible to speed up the time necessary for my body to heal from all my wounds and surgeries. In fact, it became clear to me that I would have to learn to live with certain physical limitations. I would never be able to do some of the things I could before the accident and had to come to grips with the fact that my life would never be the same. I needed to establish a new normal for my life as my body continued to heal. Even now, as the damages suffered from that fall linger and I grow older, the challenge to re-evaluate my sense of what a normal life means for me continues.
Of course, all of us would rather not have to endure the traumatic pain of a divorce – no one welcomes pain. Perhaps the reason we experience such intense pain when divorcing is because we realize a part of our self is now gone forever. Healing from a divorce is not something that can be scheduled. It does not happen within the context of our own pre-determined time constraints. And obviously, there is no such thing as getting our life back to normal after a divorce because our life is forever changed. We are compelled to re-define a new sense of normal for our lives.
During times of change and disruption, it is essential to consider the lessons our faith teaches us about healing. The Scriptures tell us to look to our Lord for physical, emotional and spiritual healing as the prophet Jeremiah (30:17) reminds us: “For I will restore health to you, and your wounds I will heal, says the Lord….”
If you or someone you know is experiencing devastation caused by a divorce, there is help. The “Catholic’s Divorce Survival Guide” is a 12-week program that guides participants from pain and isolation to hope and healing. Many who have already experienced this pastoral program have discovered their lives were improved, hope was restored, and their faith in Christ and his Church was renewed.
Donna M. Petrocelli, Spokane
(Editor’s note: For more information, email Petrocelli at email@example.com or call (509) 468-8429.)
Father Rolheiser’s article (“A primal understanding of the Eucharist,” IR 7/16/15) is interesting, but it leaves much unsaid. My response to my child preparing for his first Communion would be, “It’s okay. When you know Jesus and love him as he loves you, you will know what you are doing.”
Msgr. Knox makes the point that the last thing Jesus asked us to do was to keep celebrating the Eucharist. Yes, but at the Last Supper Jesus said (as the celebrant at Mass says), “Do this in memory of me.” To accept the bread and wine as his Body and Blood we need to remember him; know him and love him as his Apostles did. That is why the Holy Mass has the Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist. Our children don’t go to Mass because they don’t know Jesus, so the celebration is just a ritual that bores them.
Pete Ficalora, Spokane
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